So, Here’s the Update…

First, I want to thank all of you for the e-mails, IMs and posts on face book. I really appreciate that I have been in people’s thoughts and hearts. Because of the number of messages, there is no way to respond to all of you with private messages. Thus, I figured I would write this blog to update all of you at once! It’s all about the efficiency 😉

I worked my usual over night on saturday and had no problems. I got home sunday morning, ate breakfast and then the crap started. I had a right-sided partial tonic clonic seizure. Unfortunately, I cannot give a lot of details of sunday, since the seizure effected my memory and I really don’t remember much. I have been at the hospital for a crap ton of testing and monitoring/observation. I just got discharged tonight (YAY). Unfortunately, there is no clear-cut reason for the seizures. The most likely cause was a combo of my meds and sleep deprivation. So, they have changed my meds around (ugh) and hopefully that will keep me from having any more seizures. It’s the waiting game at this point. I have to see a neurologist to see if he can provide any thoughts/suggestions/insight.

So, what does this mean for me? Firstly, it means I won’t be driving any time soon. Which is super shitty because I was so close to getting my license. I cannot express how frustrating that is! Grr. There is nothing worse than working to get something for months, almost get there and then just have it snatched away. It is completely unfair. But, I suppose that is just the way that life is. Secondly, new meds mean that I have to wait and see what they do to me. They may or may not work. They may cause side effects. And the meds changes are major. They dropped 3 meds and added 2 new ones. So, it’s going to be a difficult week while my body adjusts to the changes. Especially since one of the meds is normally a med they taper people off of and I had to stop it completely without a taper. And that in and of itself has seriously sucked >.< Lastly, I may need to take more time off from work, which is going to hit us hard in the way of my pay check. It will depend on when the appointments and testing times fall. This just isn’t the kind of thing that can be put off. I am simply going to have to go for the soonest times they have available. I have a bunch of phone calls to make tomorrow and will need to get a bunch of things put into place. Until that is done, I have no idea what my medical schedule is going to look like.

I have to say that this is one of the most difficult things that has ever happened to me, for many reasons. As you all know, I am a control freak. There is nothing more frightening then loosing control of my body. It was like being possessed. With the first seizure, I went blank and don’t recall any of it. With the second seizure, I was completely aware during the whole thing. The whole time I couldn’t help but think of all the things that seizures could mean and the bad things that can happen during one. Sometimes, being a nurse sucks >.< I have to say that if I am going to have seizures, it is better to not be aware during them. I have been trying hard to keep a positive outlook and a sense of humor, but I must admit that it has been hard. I hate being the patient. I dislike needing people to take care of me. I guess I just have too much pride. And the last few days have been all about other people taking care of me. *sigh* Thankfully, my husband is a rock star! The support he gives me is what gets me through. Who else would listen to my angry rants and deal with my stupid outbursts. Seriously, I think I am the worse patient ever! I must have asked a billion questions about the med plan/changes and pestered the poor nurses to madness. They must have been happy tonight when the doctor ordered for my discharge 😛 The waiting is the worst. I really can’t do anything until all the testing and appointments have been done. I just need to wait so I can know where it is that I stand. Not knowing why the seizures happened make it impossible to predict what will happen next. How do you plan anything when you have to consider the possibility of a seizure coming at any time? How do you prevent something when you aren’t sure why it happened in the first place? I feel so completely helpless…

Not sure how much I will be on-line. I will try to make posts as updates. No promises how often those updates will be though. Again, thank you for having me in your thoughts. It makes things easier when I think about all the people who care and are hoping/praying for my well being. You guys seriously rock! ❤


About piggie4299

I am Myself I am a Wife Blessed with love I am a Mother Endowed with divinity Through the power of creation I am a Daughter Brought into this world With unending hope And the promise of the future I am a Sister Made fierce and strong While forged with kindness Protector and protected Spiraling together forever I am a Nurse Holding out the hands of healing And offering the sick comfort And the dying love Knowing that through this All things are healed and made whole I am a Writer Creating myself and world Sharing the inner depths of humanity Bringing together the divine And the humble mortal I tell the story of the Goddess And am remembered forever

Posted on September 20, 2011, in Medical and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. So sorry to hear you had been sick! It is terrible! But genki up! Place a lot of pretty and beautiful things around, things that make you happy, so that your mood may be happier. But be careful of the attacking buuta-tachi!


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